Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
did i really sing to your nipples last night?
yes. and it was oddly very seductive
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
Drunkenly, I gave him a molly instead of an aleve so A) I'm still looking for him and B) I'm not sure about his headache.
Closed my eyes in the shower and got really dizzy. Not sure if neurological or result of 4 day vodka binge. Send help.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize
