Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I want to have a prehistoric party. By that, I mean I want to dress up as a dinosaur and get drunk. That's all I want in life.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
doing an easter egg hunt in a liquor store right now. i feel so adult
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
YOU WERE HAVING SEX IN THE SAME BED I WAS SLEEPING IN. AND YOU GRABBED MY HAIR. OF COURSE I'M PISSED.
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
Why did this happen to me why did I have to meet him if I could go back in time I never would have grabbed his dick
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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