That's intense
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
Couch. On fire.
I didn’t want to see that boob. I told her not to show me but she said “no, I’m going to show you”
Randomize
