Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
I just woke up wearing retainers... they are most definitely not mine
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
Don't text me when you know I'm doing lines on my phone
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
she kept asking for a lobster dinner while she was crying. it was actually the most reasonable drunk chick request i've ever heard.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He could smell the liquor on my breath. Fuck. I thought he would smell French toast.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
Randomize
