Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
I just saw a guy masturbating vigorously at the bus stop across from del taco at 2:30am...im pretty sure he wasn't even homeless
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
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