he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
we hooked up on one of my student's desks last night...i can't decide if i'm ashamed or massively proud of myself
dude you teach first grade wtf
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
i just wrote an ode to an enchilada dorito. i'll need that pregnancy test now please.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Literally told everyone you're my idol cause you ate a chicken nugget off a sword
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
I can't believe you tried to cock block me from A DIFFERENT TIME ZONE.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize