Pants 0. Shit 1.
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Because you know it would be fucking amazing to get trashed and shatter the dreams of 12 year old girls. I might get a shirt.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Green mimosas i think yes
VODKAVODKAVODKAYESSSS
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Seriously, this trumpet player gives me chills. Might be the drugs.
The instructions say refer to specific course material, but I'm in no mood to reopen this awful book that caused me so many lost hours of drinking.
Yeah FUCK THAT NOISE
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize