So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
you'll never guess what i found when i got home...
a cake, in the toilet
Tell me why I keep soberly hesitating to go pee in fear of breaking the seal. Thank you college.
It got a little outta hand when you wanted to do body shots on the table.. at Dennys.. at 4 AM.. with lemonade
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
Question for you. Do you want to go out somewhere or do you want to have sloppy joes at my house? That's not a euphemism for anything; I actually have stuff to make sloppy joes
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
I’m vetoing meatball margaritas right out the gate. We can’t have people throwing up again!
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