its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
I'm at the grocery store, it's 10 am and the woman in front of me just bought 3 boxes of wine. She turned around and told me not to be afraid
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
I understand where he's coming from but I don't want this alcohol to revolve around relationship
Wait
on a scale of 1 to 'no sex' how busy are you this week?
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
Sweet tea and masterbation. It's how I manage.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
