i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
Let me stew on this while im plucking my nipple hairs and showering.
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Oh the sweet dreamless sleep of drugs
You? On what? Why?
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