he spit gasoline on a tiki torch to impress a girl. he caught on fire but did get laid. success.
in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
The cops wrote boobs in the police report. ...vandalism is our calling
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I laid naked in his bed as he brought me an ice cream sandwich so I would say everything worked out great
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
