She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
Why were you eating a hot dog in the bathroom at 230 am?
My roommate was sleeping, I thought it would be rude
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I am in an eBay bidding war over a build a bear one direction tshirt, this is who you choose to bone
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
He just felt my tits to find out which piercing I lost.
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
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