Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
As I took my shirt off he commented on how great my boobs where. I responded with "thanks, I grew them myself"
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
The weirdest part of it all was wondering if I was going to take off his fanny pack or he was before we fucked
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