did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
I just remembered how awesome your handjobs were in 7th grade, you were a true champ, thank you
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
These tits shall not be calmed
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I was writing 'DISTRACTION' across my chest in Sharpie when my boob fell out. Right on camera.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
