its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
Well, he's moving. Now my only options are to accept it or fake a pregnancy; and since you are my only pregnant friend I'm going to need you to pee on this stick for me.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Drake has all the answers
Ugh. He got her for secret santa. Idk what to get. Idk what she's into.
... other people's boyfriends.
Randomize
