i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I forgot I did whipits. Probably because my brain cells were killed from the whipits
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Oh and people at work think i got knocked up so my gay roomie is claiming it as his lol
Randomize
