Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
she chased the tour bus screaming I BET YOUR DICK IS THE SIZE OF YOUR MICROPHONE STAND. i think its safe to say were never getting vip passes again.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Bailing my boss from jail at five in the morning.. If thats not a promotion I don't what is.
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
You've changed since you got that strap on
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