Im handcuffed to some kid i hardly know. there are no cops involved
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
I've gotta stop getting kicked out of bars for fighting with people over the accuracy of the Harry Potter movie.
I drunk-cried for all conjoined twins everywhere the other day.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
It just makes sense. It's like I end a relationship, and wash myself of sin... with tequila.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize