That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
This lady in my dui class just asked what patron was. I feel like she doesn't belong here
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
I still don't know why she was so offended when I emerged from the bathroom and told her my balls were now clean.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
it was weird going down on him. His picture of Jesus was staring at me the entire time...
He's so drunk that he's ignoring me and just doing what my cat does.
Oh god he's trying to eat cat food... I don't know if I should stop him or continue laughing....
Randomize
