Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
And God said, "Let there be Twilight," and it was so.
I should injure you considerably.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
she screamed "my eye!" and it brought me a surge of bad memories. except she was yelling about a lemon.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
I'm out of prison. Wanna start a band?
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Randomize
