There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Hypothetically, how much legal trouble do you think i will be in for stealing someone's dog?
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
My goal for the weekend: procure a blowjob using only stern glances, hand gestures, and crudely-drawn stick figures.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
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