Grinding on my ninth grade teacher. Dreams really do come true
I was the only open register tonight and I just sold condoms and chocolate frosting to the ex..
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
He compared my vagina to his favorite T-shirt. I don't know if I should take that as a compliment or not..
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
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