Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
My poo smells like dog food. That's how I know it was a good night.
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
She sent me a pic wearing only my batman cape. She stole my cape dude!
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
don't give me stepladders when i'm stoned.. i woke up to a slice of balogna nailed to the ceiling
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
