If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
I threw up so much beer last night that my puke had a nice head on it.
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
The day i have a fb album titled " I have become a townie" you can shoot me in the foot and tell me to get my life together
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
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