it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
My drunk body wants to fuck you so bad, but my high mind is telling me it's too much work. I think I'm just gonna stay home and eat some Mac and cheese. Sorry.
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I am thankful for thumbs.
Because without thumbs, we would be dolphins.
Land dolphins.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
You brought string cheese to the strip club
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
Randomize
