I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
did that guy on the oscars really just tell me to text a dolphin?
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
Was banging my ex last night when his roommate walked in... We kept going. #goaheadandwatch
My cat just tried to lay on my stomach while I was masturbating. And I let her because I am so starved for affection.
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
