i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Yea. I feel great. My life is great. My job isn't as shitty. And my daddy loves me. I love strip clubs. Great self esteem boost.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
And speaking of good acting I may have a sex tape now
Wanna go on a picnic?
... by picnic I mean wanna sit on a blanket and drink with me?
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