He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
It's tuesday, which means cocktails followed by cocktales.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Two days later and my throat is still sore. That bong is a double edged sword.
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
I woke up in some kids room and he introduced me to his friends at breakfast as "Monica" so I just went with it.
Nothing says "Happy New Year" like having to shit into a plastic bag.
The good news is I woke up fully clothed, on top of my covers, with a half eaten granola bar. So, breakfast was waiting for me and I’m already dressed and ready to go today.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
You know he wants it bad when he starts going door to door for condoms.
Randomize
