Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
Talking to a male stripper. About the LSAT. Only in Vegas.
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
One of the guys I danced with wanted to give me his number so I convinced him I had a photographic memory and that I would remember it.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
You started pulling out condoms from your fanny pack and threw them at all the couples on the beach
on a scale from 1 to "can't put a toothbrush in your mouth without gagging" how hungover are you?
Randomize
