There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
I'm sorry, but the "Hobbit Slam" has to be a sex move.
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
I'm at the store buying a new phone cause I pissed all over mine last night. Drunk me is expensive as shit.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
Randomize
