I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I just found puke in my bra..
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
I definitely paid for a case and a fifth and all I got was 6 beers and a crown and coke. Wtf. Bar math sucks
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Since when is my clitoris pierced?
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
