He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
he puked in his toast at dennys. after snoopdogg high fived him. couldn't be prouder to be his bro in law.
Help. All alone. Room is. Changing colors. Dance party 2010, but without dancing.
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
Sext: Bring me pancakes from the midnight breakfast gathering please
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
Randomize
