brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Oh my god he is having a sentimental moment right now.
He just sent me like a really heartfelt confession of love in which he ended with "make the apt, I'll hold your hand while you get your clit pierced."
Never drink rum straight from the bottle, even if people say it'll make you a pirate. It won't: it'll make you a bumbling shitfaced idiot who just drank rum straight from the bottle.
I just found 51 cents in my bed. Did you leave me a tip?
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
His apartment number was 69. I had to.
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
It's like we come as a package. Your slogan should be "be in my family, sleep with my roommate."
My slogan can be "bonding the family together. One dick at a time."
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
The bouncer said the club was at capacity we couldnt get in till ppl left all three of them pulled their tits out we got complimentary bottle service never under estimate women
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