Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
On a scale of 0 to Thanksgiving, there is no amount of food that fights against tequila.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
If I had your ass I would rule the world
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
