We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Ok say I was sexually attracted to a patient who also happens to be in high school...on how many levels is that illegal? And will I actually hear the laws break when I fuck him
drove into oncoming traffic. add a minute to my ETA
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
Yes, he does have a boomerang dick. No matter how many times I throw it away, it keeps coming right back and winds up hitting me in the head.
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
Randomize
