i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
me neither. i remember bell pepper tequila but not why or yelling
Hahaha, I forgot about doing shots out of the bell pepper
Is it sad I don't want to go buy $1 Mac-n-cheese cause I need to pay rent... I'm re-naming this college.
Also, peanut butter on a spoon dinner is back in existence and it is good.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I told him he deserved someone better...then I told him he looked very fuck-able wearing nothing but sweat pants. We'll break up in the morning.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
Someone just asked me why I drink so much. Im gonna slap a bitch
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize