You can't wash away shame.
I can try.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
earned some solid air miles from the plan B I just bought. #silverlinings
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Randomize
