WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Ordered weed last night from the delivery service, and who showed up...my old real estate broker. He said, "this is less stressful." Duh.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
This is the most boring acid ever. I feel like a child. But thats okay, I've been a child before, its nothing new.
Showed up physical therapy hammered. The therapist just says this isnt part of the program.
We're not piercing ourselves today.
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
Randomize
