I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
Watched a women out our tannin salon literally fight police because she was getting arrested for trying to drunkenly fight the tanning salon owner...we need to step up our day drinking this is shameful.
Nothing like a 3am firealarm to kick a booty call out...
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
Stoned, and eating Doritos, and reading about lesbians for class. This is the life.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
yes we're having sex but I'm texting you...so what does that tell you?
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
Randomize
