he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
G&T. Gin and tonic. GIN AND TONIC. GIN AND TONIC AND FUCKING LIME
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
