So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
You drank the expired grape juice because you were convinced it had fermented into wine...you have a problem.
I woke up with semen in my invisalign. My molars were just marinating in it
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
A man in denim coveralls just shotgunned a beer on the dance floor
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
That awkward moment when you are on your way to ICU and the only sympathy gift you can think of is beer and whiskey
I fear our relationship is coming to an end. Last night I felt the need to bloody apologise for waking him up with a blow job.
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