You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
There was blow residue on my chem book and my TA was like, did u stain your notebook with CaCO3?
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
there is glitter all over my balls
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Fucking hate kids. In particular I hate our kids.
Randomize
