I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.
obviously my correlation between being a pro surfer and being extremely good in bed was 100% wrong.
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
idk man, i just want to be a bad influence for future generations
Makes sense. My grandma just did this shot. MY FAMILY KICKS ASS.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
I just used a gift card from my in-laws to buy their daughter a vibrator. What even are morals?
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize
