what time did you get home last night?
SO late...when your in the lap of a 35 year old superstar you loose track of time
He said to me " i could be your father but i dont care"...it was so hott
My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
My life is like a Sweet Valley High book but with lots of alcohol.
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Because nothing screams stable like yelling at a guy in a bar because last time you hooked up he stole your underwear.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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