# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
Can you work for me at 4? We might have just taken some drugs we found in the couch and... end of story
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
I'm hungover and in a fort. And I hate you.
So many questions
Randomize
