so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
Just saw the first guy i ever slept with in drag. I can hear my grandfather saying "i knew she was a lesbian" somewhere
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
Randomize
