I think their strategy was based on people bein at a beach, seein a rainbow, and havin an orgasm at the same time.
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
Bored at work. googling vodka waffles.
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
