Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
All I've consumed over the last couple days is Vanilla Coke, semen, and Coors. I don't think today will be any different.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
DIN'T JUSGE NE.
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I am the Angelina Jolie to his Billy Bob Thorton. We just don't work.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
Randomize