Today I ate a sandwich and half my molar fell off, feels like a semi sprayed into my jaw.
I wish i was spraying into your jaw.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
You don't understand, we were on a waffle house. Both of us were absolutely certain we passed out at his place then BAM! Waffle house.
After everything you did, you followed it with "Oh God, that's something a high person would do. But I'm not high." So yeah, you're not getting near my stash again.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
No joke, I just found $85 on the ground. Must be because I bought you all that liquor. So much good karma.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
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