Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
Jon and Kate are totally playing with my emotions.
i mean i care more about their marriage then my own parents
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that he can say will you fuck me in so many languages or that I'm turned on because of that
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
There's a guy in a plaid shirt running around asking everyone if they want to head butt him
Randomize
