highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
Hamster emergency. Can u come in here
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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