i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I'm someone's dream girl. I'm hungover in this guy's bed wearing ONLY a Brian Westbrook jersey. Not the same I was on a date with last night.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Is there a lightning bolt coming out of your boner right now?!
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
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